Everything or nothing much.

Someone long ago said to me, often repeated as a way of reprimand or criticism, “you get out of life what you put into it”.  These days this saying seems to me to have been downgraded even further to mean things like “we make a difference”.  Really ?  When perhaps all we are hoping is to  merely make it through the day and be left alone.  A few however, like the Lady Chatterley character, actually step outside their normal abode sometimes, into the garden.

But why so few.  Could it be that courage or even desperation, must be needed by these few to leap into the yet unknown.  Surely this is not mere genetics or fate.  Commonly I hear of the feeling of safely in the known, no matter how sad the familiar is.  A passable justification for being “the way we always are”.  Perhaps the idea has never occurred that any future we choose, can be different from our past, one step at a time.  Sad, if the idea of being truly blissfully happy can only be a dream; a movie.  As Martin Luther King Jr famously declared, “I have a dream” and that surely is a good start.  Especially if we truly seek out ways to materialise in a real way that dream with our deeds and not merely in our often useless wishing words.  Could starting with our desire for our dream to materialise against the real and often resisting world we find ourselves engaged in everyday; being no longer content to pretend that the whole world is a happy place.  What an effort that is, to pretend, to experience the world as nothing.

So who I ask, has the courage to step out and show up saying, “I will do anything” and follow through.  Or even words like, “I am truly open and will do anything that works for the better of the world or whatever”, including I hasten to add, for each of us.  Such rare people have actually existed in human history, especially in these dire days, obviously could do with a few more.  Alas, there are no advertisements around for such people and even if they did, the pay would likely be poverty and ridicule.

In the mean time, I suppose I better walk into town and buy myself a pie for lunch, if they have any left.  Bread alone may not be enough, as has been said every Sunday, but some money is needed to make it though the day, surely.  And in those few moments alone walking ahead ( there and back ) if it is looking like it soon may rain: an umbrella could be useful too, to take along just in case.  Useful to me at least, yes, but does that make a difference ?  Who knows and who really gives a damn.  This is what mystifies me on most days.  Nevertheless, I usually wake up happy in the morning and that is the other mystery of mine.  Not a complaint, simply a mystery, with no way of going back it would seem… to nothing much … just getting by.

© 2016, James Harry Burton. All rights reserved.